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I hope you do. Sounds awful, I
know. But I really think the best thing that can happen to
you is for you to take a timid little leap and fall flat
on your face. Then, I want to see you get back up,
evaluate what you did wrong, and jump again. Keep on
taking that leap of faith and learning from each and every
mistake until you become used to jumping and used to
falling. Then, you'll get over the fear of falling and
you'll finally begin to concentrate on flying. I want to
see you run with everything you have and dive into your
dreams with so much passion and fire that you forget all
about the possibility of failing. You will never find your
wings until you do.
The fear of failure is a
cruel and stupid trick we pull on ourselves. The fact that
the fear of failure stops us from going after our goals
and dreams means that we've already failed. I ask you
this, who cares if you fail? Brilliant people fail every
single day. Brave tenacious people fall flat on their
faces and even get laughed at every single day. Here's an
example of a perfectly nice person who has been known to
fail, Christopher Reeves. How many mornings did he wake up
telling himself that he was going to walk and then went to
bed having failed yet again. Great guy, people love him.
He's not going to let a little thing like yesterday's
failure stop him from working hard again today. He's an
inspiration to everyone who knows him. Who ever planted
that stupid idea in our heads that we had to be successful
at every single thing every single day in order to be
likeable?
What is failure anyway? In
my eyes, Christopher Reeves is definitely not a failure.
Nobody with that much tenacity, focus, and drive is
failing. He is a real hero. You haven't failed until
you've given up trying. As long as you're still taking
leaps of faith, you're still a winner. Failure, like
everything else, has its breaking point. At some point, if
you hit at it in the same spot over and over again it
eventually breaks. How many light bulbs did Thomas Edison
make before he got it right? Most people don't know the
answer to that because they don't care how many times he
failed before he finally succeeded. He kept learning from
each attempt, adapting to the knew information, stayed the
course, held the dream, and didn't let the fear of failure
nor the fear of other people's ridicule stop him.
One of the reasons that I
think we hear so many stories of immigrants coming to this
country and making it big is because they were raised on
stories of the ability to create whatever kind of life you
envision for yourself here. It's like all the stories they
grew hearing about how everyone has the right to succeed
in America overrides any underlying belief that they
themselves could fail. They don't have a fear of failure
so they just roll up their sleeves and get to work making
their dreams come true. Sure they stumble and fall and
learn a few lessons along the way, but they certainly
don't give up and quit.
Afraid of what other people
are going to think of you if you fail? Have you ever met
someone who played it ultra safe that was very impressive?
People who don't take risks are seldom if ever cheered,
admired, or in the limelight. Besides, Americans love an
underdog. We love to see some scrappy go-getter who has no
business thinking they can win. We love to watch that same
person stumble and fall a few times only to pick
themselves up and really make something of themselves.
It's the American Dream. Hollywood knows it. They've made
an entire industry of showing us the stories of underdogs
who dust themselves off and finally become winners. Nobody
pays money to watch a movie about some perfect person who
designs a perfect dream and experiences a flawless life
while accomplishing everything they set out to do easily
and effortlessly. Boooooring! We don't like people who
come across as too perfect anyway. So go ahead and fail,
it gives us a reason to pay attention to you, to relate to
you, to cheer you on.
One of the best pieces of
advice I was ever given on this subject was back in high
school when I was first learning how to water-ski. I was
told, "If you aren't falling down, then you aren't
trying very hard. You're playing it safe, staying in your
comfort zone. You aren't getting any better." That
pushed me to get past my fear of falling. I beat the heck
out of my poor body that summer, but I also made
impressive gains in my ability to master the sport. Nobody
talked about how many times I fell that summer nor how
black and blue I was, they only talked about how fast I
was learning and what a great job I was doing. My teacher
would sit back with this self-satisfied smirk on his face
because only he knew how hard it had been for me to push
past that comfort zone to allow myself permission to fall
down. Nothing beats taking that big bite out of life and
having it bite back just a bit! Laugh it off and dive in
again.
Are you really going to
shelve something so dear to your heart because you might
fail? If I could promise you that you'd only fail twice
and on the third attempt you would succeed, then would you
go ahead and suffer through the first two failures in
order to get to that third time? Of course, you would. All
that's left to debate is how many times. So go ahead...
take that first leap of faith.
Copyright 2004, Skye
Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge
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About
The Author
Skye
Thomas is the CEO of Tomorrow's Edge, an
Internet leader in inspiring leaps of
faith. She became a writer in 1999 after
twenty years of studying spirituality,
metaphysics, astrology, personal growth,
motivation, soulmates, and parenting. Her
books and articles have inspired people of
all ages and faiths to recommit themselves
to the pursuit of happiness. After years
of high heels and business clothes, she is
currently enjoying working from home in
her pajamas. To read more of her articles,
sign up to receive her free weekly
newsletter, and get free previews of her
books go to www.TomorrowsEdge.net.
Skye@TomorrowsEdge.net |
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